Monday, February 12, 2007

New Yorker Caption Contest #86: My Entry


I usually try to draw it, but the conditions suggest "pincer movement."


Friday, February 9, 2007

How to Write a Movie Review

1) Go here.

2) Drop all your current pretenses and vain, nervy ticks. Write like this.

3) Keep referring back to this any time you think you're starting to get cute.

4) Lather, rinse, repeat.

(Thanks for the link, Mr. Alan Asper, wherever you are.)


Saturday, February 3, 2007

Global Warming's relentless advance meets fierce local resistance


…It's the kind of weather that takes you back to the coldest days of childhood memory (if your American childhood was spent anywhere north of, say, Indianapolis). I remember some walks to the bus stop in eighth and ninth grade — 1984 and 1985 — in central Michigan when it was about –20°F and the snow crunched like broken Styrofoam beneath your feet. It was the strangest sound, and I guess it's what water does when it's moved somewhere beyond ice.

There isn't enough snow here to test that memory very effectively tonight, but the wind is a pretty sharp refresher. The trees creak and clatter like taut steel cabling. We also have that full moon, and it has the silvery menace of a disc of dry ice, held in a clenched fist on a dare.

I think I'll stand on my back porch for a few moments tonight, just to commit this rare freeze to memory once more. When summer's heat roars back, the novelty of it will be something to relish.